Booty Pop

I have no words..... I don't even know what to say, except that I can't believe there is a product for a bigger rounder butt when I've been trying to wish my big ole booty away all these years!!!!!!!! It's almost annoying especially when I think about all the insecurities that I have that revolve around my butt....
It just goes to show the grass is always greener on the other side.

I can't get the video to load from you tube. So watch the commercial here!

oh! and they're having a sale! now if only they could make underwear that makes your butt smaller for me....

More eggs

I've spent the day online trying to find a college that offers two psychology classes online at a price that I can possibly afford. The local community college doesn't offer them online. (a must because I can't possibly spend four nights a week in class) and everywhere else I've looked one online class is like $1000+.  To be honest I am feeling a little bit discouraged. anyways...

Brilliant idea! maybe I should donate my eggs!
I have perfectly good ones. I'm not using them. And I could really use the money...
That would probably pay for a whole year of college! This is the best idea I've ever had!

Well I'm sad to report that I only have one more month until I no longer meet the minimum requirements.
Because it is such a lengthy process, that probably won't do...

Doh! *hand to head* Why didn't I think of this before I got so old!? hahah!

I was reading about the differences between women donating eggs and men donating sperm.... If I was a man I would be donating sperm like it was my job! That is some easy money! :)

To freeze eggs or not to freeze eggs

I never really considered what it must be like to be the single, mid 30s girl. The old adage your biological clock is ticking was just a joke my friends and I threw around like it would never happen to us. When I turned 29 several men (brothers and coworker/friends) in my life reminded me that my biological clock was ticking, and that my eggs were "getting old" or "drying up". Honestly, I never considered it much. My biggest concern was if I  waited too long, would I be able to keep up with my kids when we do overnight back packing trips as a family. I always wanted to be young enough to still "play with my kids."

However, in talking to a few of my single guy friends about their dating prospects, it turns out they take this age thing and a woman's fertility to heart.... and many are bypassing the "older" girl for someone younger. Surprisingly, this is not because she possess young soft delicate skin, nor is it because her boobs and butt are still perky, or can sport the au natural hair color, (although I'm sure all that stuff helps) but because she is young and they don't have to worry about infertility.

Like I said, I never really worried about not being able to have children, but now that I think of it, the reality is that it's only 5 small years away. I'm not so much worried about not being able to get pregnant or bear children, (because the women in my family are notoriously known as "fertile Myrtles") as much as I am worried about being counted in the group of women that are "too old" to date. I can't just announce or go around wearing a sign assuring every single guy that my eggs are in fact still good and plentiful.

Well, I came across this article, "Freezing Eggs Extends Fertility Options." I honestly considered it for a a minute and read the article... hmmm.... Maybe I should freeze my eggs. just in case... But again, would I really want to be chasing a two year old around when I'm 45 or wishing I could have participated in backpacking trips with my kids at 55?

Anyways, I decided not to freeze my eggs.

Lessons from "The Bachelor"

confession:
I just watched the bachelor. hahaha! Despite my decision to not watch it this season, I couldn't resist when my sister in law told me how good it was, not because of all the great girls or anything noble and good (because who watches the bachelor for that...? hahaha) but because there are so many crazy chicks and there is so much drama! and i agree completely. I'm hooked. there are so many psychos I have to watch it!

There are a lot of crazy weird girls and it is really juicy but I just watched the second episode tonight. One girl, I think her name is Jenna (It doesn't matter because she is gone, and here is why) told Ben, "I feel like I'm a guy in how I act, and so like being around girls all the time is very uncomfortable at times... I'm not like a girl. If that makes any sense.." REALLY?!
Did you just say you are like a guy and not like a girl!? (hand to forehead) I'm not quite sure why she would say something like that! Guys don't want to date guys! They want to date girls!
Needless to say she no longer on the show.... I wonder why!?

Don't try to be a guy or like a guy or try to convince a guy that you are like a guy! I know there is this idea that it's super cool to be "one of the guys" and hope that one of them will like you... but that only happens in the movies! In the end a guy wants to date a girl that is like a girl, unless he is gay....

Sometimes I can't figure out how to get videos to work on here so here is a link. just skip towards the end.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/316936/the-bachelor-week-2

I don't have the link or source for this as it was on facebook but I love it and had to share

Email of the day from match.com:

"Let's spoil you!"

Really?! that's it....?  No "hi. how are you?"  "hi. my name is..." ?! nothing is more insulting than to have someone minimize who I am as a woman. Okay! There are a lot more insulting things. hahahaha! Just being dramatic... but really?!

He may as well have just said, " I know you are a girl, so you must be dumb and superficial and only care about getting stuff and things.... So rather than waste my time typing a real message and to get to know you, I'm just going to play off your materialistic nature by saying 'let's spoil you.' okay? Now swoon...."

No thank you! Go spoil someone else who doesn't have brain. I'm looking for more than someone to spoil me and you didn't make the cut.

I broke down and started taking all of my sweaters out of storage for the winter. :( meh!

And I saw a few pairs of my "smaller" pants that don't fit me anymore. I always throw out my larger size pants because when I lose weight I always tell myself, "I will never let myself gain weight again!" But of course I do save my smaller pants! I'm just like that girl who buys clothes a size too small because "I'm going to fit into them someday." hahah! Anyways I thought well I think I've lost some weight maybe some of the bigger ones will fit so I tried them on. Believe it or not two of them actually fit! I was so stinkin' excited. Granted they are only a size ten..... hahahaha! But for a little bit there my bigger pants were pretty tight. As in butt tight! I feared I would have to go shopping for new pants, which I dread.

The point of all this is I actually feel pretty good about my size right now. Not that I don't still have pudgy knees and "rugby calves" (as described by one of my brother's friends in high school) and my boobs have given into gravity.  But I feel healthy. I have come to accept that I will never be a size 6. It's just not in me and that is not who I am. Even when I was in the best shape of my life and working out a ton, getting down to a size 8 was impossible. I also have embraced my curves. I have a ghetto booty and it's not going away. I am curvatious, and I'm pretty sure there are at least a handful of guys out there who will not equate that with being "fat." And if there aren't.... well then.... that's just too bad because I will always have this butt! And that is okay, and fine and good.

In life, as in art, the beautiful moves in curves."

Edward G Bulwer-Lytton

"Cultivate your curves - they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.
Mae West

I'm reading the "Tao of Dating" yeah when I go through something such as a breakup I tend to try my hardest to learn as much as I can from it so I don't have to experience it again. I am all about learning, growing and moving forward. Also maybe a part of me doesn't like how it feels (depression, emptiness, rejection, missing someone, disappointment, etc) so I try to find other ways to occupy my mind, through reading self help books.
Oh how I love me some self improvement books!

From today's reading: it may sound hokey but whatever!
To be a goddess is to embody beauty, love, radiance, grace.
and I am reminded of a training I attended a few years ago as I was going through the hardest time of my marriage, I was able to connect with my inner goddess of truth and beauty.

And a quote by Marianne Williamson, that I used to not like so much, but I get it. Now I get it and I love it!

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”